Summer

And that brings me to this summer. This summer of sex. We could not stop.

We have; after a month of getting high and fucking four or five times a week, we finally hit a wall and had to take a little break. It’s now Thursday and we’ve been off since Saturday night, I think, when she just wasn’t getting high and eventually told me to finish up because she was tired of waiting for it to get fun. Have I mentioned this before? If I’m taking a long time to get high, it’s annoying, but I can fool around while I wait. If she’s taking a long time to get high she tends to get all the dizziness and none of the fun, and she gets really pissed off. This time she was in better spirits about it and was being a really good sport; in fact, she gave me a great blowjob, which she usually doesn’t get into unless she’s pretty high. But while she had a few orgasms, probably 10, they were happening at such a slower rate than usual she gave up and we went to bed.

But that was just a sad ending to an incredible run. We really couldn’t stop. There were a few times we went three nights in a row, and and probably no period of 10 days in which we fucked fewer than 6 nights. I know there are people out there who have sex multiple times daily, but

a) Are they 50+ years old?
b) When they fuck, is it for 2-5 hours each time?

I mean, we had sex for around 60 hours in the month of June. That’s more than either of us worked! (I should mention that I’m consulting now and work is pretty slow; she’s had her hours reduced at work). Part of it has to do with the end of school; the kids are out and we’re not waking up at 6am to feed the cats and get breakfast ready. We’re waking up at 6am to feed the cats then going back to bed. Basically, we’re making the most of summer and being partly jobless. We’ll run out of money at some point, but let nobody say we failed to enjoy the time we had to ourselves. In short, I’m proud of us.

There’s something else going on that has made it hard to write. I got Tears of the Kingdom for Father’s Day. Oh man. I loved Breath of the Wild. I mean, “loved” may not be the word. I think it’s the best electronic game EVER. And Tears of the Kingdom is just as good. It’s not just more of the same … they changed enough (with the various forms of crafting, and the verticality of the environment) that it doesn’t even really feel that familiar. This is not why you’re here, but I feel compelled to make excuses when I haven’t written for a while. The excuses are a) lots and lots of sex and b) video game addiction.

I should tell you, though, about one night. There was a celebration–there were a couple this month in addition to Father’s Day, and I’m not going to tell you what they were. But one was big, and by chance every kid was away that night. We’d gone to one of Philly’s great restaurants, Laser Wolf, and had a great meal, that was then followed by a really big night. Best ever, actually, and I’m trying not to overuse that.

Well, until last night. Now it’s Saturday and last night was amazing. Maybe not best ever? But it was special and different and amazing. We had taken that little break, of however long it was, 6 days if I’m right about Saturday being our last big night. So, the pressure was building inside me for sure, and inside my goddess, and we let it out.

My wife is the goddess of sex. Oh my fucking g-d. I really wish I knew a way to write about this; there’s a thing that happens when we’re together and just giving up our bodies to each other. I think other people have felt this–the togetherness, the unity that physical intimacy promotes. Like, we’re there fucking each other’s brains out, and it feels great physically and mentally, but emotionally this thing happens that I wouldn’t necessarily predict. Physically I’m feeling euphoric; I mean, I’m on drugs and feeling all decadent and really good. And then mentally I’m feeling like this perfect woman belongs to me and I couldn’t feel better or prouder about myself, you know, my confidence and self-worth are completely peaking. All of which could mean I’d feel kind of selfish but that’s not what happens. The truth is we feel so close to each other and like we’re both only giving, not taking.

Why am I saying this: the point of this blog is something like “not only can you have great sex in a committed, long-term relationship, there are some kinds of great sex I don’t think you can have without the long-term commitment.” I.e. the trust is pretty essential to it. What I’m talking about here, what we did in this case, we just would not have felt that without the deep trust. But also lots of other stuff–the spanking, the whipping, the various forms of domination–that totally wouldn’t work. I mean, 20 years ago I would probably have told you that’s not what I wanted, but in part because I didn’t see it working, or didn’t know how to get it working.

By the way, it’s now Wednesday and I can’t say exactly when I wrote each part of this. I did a bit between Saturday and today, but I don’t know what. This post is killing me, so I’m just going to call it, and hopefully the next one will be good.