As usual I don’t really know where to start. Last weekend we had the best sex of our lives–loving, intimate, dirty for 3.5 hours straight, a few short breaks as usual. We’ve also had two really good sober sex sessions. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this before but it’s cool how behaviors & attitudes that developed with the high sex have become part of our system when we’re not high. It reassures me that what we do when high is not apart from our real-life desires, but more of a relaxation of strictures by which we were allowing ourselves to be bound (or at least, I was allowing myself to be bound). Without knowing it.
While I have been totally killing it lately with the cunnilinguism, I wanted to highlight a couple more activities that are essential to our success.
1. Hands. Use your hands on your partner’s clit and pussy. On the outside, try everything. Pressing, rolling it around in circles, flicking it up and down. If she has panties on you can scratch with fingertips/short nails, and that works. When she doesn’t, use lube at least some of the time–even if you don’t need it, it’s a variation that’s awesome. Another thing we do she calls “slice,” meaning I hold two fingers together and rub, with her clit riding up and down in the crack between them. That immediately sets her off when I time it right, or whenever I do it, it won’t take too long before she explodes. Another is “pinchy,” i.e. squeezing her clit between thumb and forefinger. When she’s on top I can kind of twist my hand upside-down and do it, and that will pretty reliably give her a huge orgasm.
Pinchy is also good when your other hand is in her snatch. For the insides, of course, experiment as always. You want to sometimes push your fingers in deep, depending on how she’s feeling, but even just playing with the tight little keyhole at the front works wonders. And then, if you don’t already know, taking two fingers and curling them up around the bone to press her g-spot, i.e. as far as I can tell, her clit from the inside, pressing, wiggling, and stroking in there will turn her into an animal. As I get her worked up more and more (pinchy and g-spot at the same time can be epic) she’ll then sometimes ask me to go faster and faster, or plunge in deep. When in deep I feel around for spots. I don’t really know what it is, I guess her cervix, but there are some structures in there that can be pretty intense. I absolutely can’t start there–it’s only for when she’s warmed up.
2. Biting. There’s clit biting, which of course we do a lot of and if you’re afraid of it, it may not be as risky as you think. One surefire way I can give her a mind-bendingly long and powerful orgasm is to grab gently onto her clit with my front teeth, squeezing the tip of it out and into my mouth, where I then flick left and right with my tongue, starting kind of fast and gradually getting faster and faster. As long as I can keep it up she just gets wilder and wilder, going deeper into the orgasm and never releasing. I’m pretty sure we’ve kept it up for 3+ minutes of her writhing and squealing, but time in that situation is probably a little dilated, so I don’t have a lot of faith in that number. Whatever it is, it’s long. Anyway eventually my tongue gets into oxygen debt and I slow down, and the release floods through her. Pinching her nipples at the same time, or just at the very end, can be good.
Now, with the writhing there’s the risk that she pulls her clit out of its little prison there and gets hurt. All I can say is, yes, it happens, but when she’s feeling so much pleasure she doesn’t seem to feel any pain. If I make the same mistake before she’s in ecstasy, she can sometimes need a short recovery break.
Anyway I’ve probably mentioned that kind of biting before, and I was actually trying not to talk about pussy eating, I just got carried away. What I think I haven’t mentioned, and meant to mention, is neck and shoulder biting. The biter is the vampire, and the bitee is the victim, and as the vampire it’s your job to make the victim feel as vulnerable, and willing and thrilled to be vulnerable, as possible. When I get this right she is truly, deeply, inevitably mine. To get there, I nibble little bits of neck, I bite hard on the muscle that runs down from neck to shoulder, and I grab chunk of neck and squeeze them a little harder, a little harder, a little harder until she’s in desperate pain and desperately loving it, and loving me. It’s overpowering, and the power relationship is completely unbalanced in my favor. But of course we only get there because of the deep trust we have and her knowledge somewhere deep inside that I will always only do everything she wants me to do, and never anything else.
Valentine’s Day is this weekend. I’ve been trying to make a big deal of it lately. So has she. Last year was huge, I think I posted something about an amazing gift that’s too unique to describe here. Also we had a hotel room so we could make noise and use all the toys we wanted. This year we couldn’t work out how to get the children taken care of elsewhere, so it’ll be quiet sex again. I’m getting the house cleaned so she doesn’t have to think about it. Judging from some appointments on our shared calendar, she’s getting her muff trimmed and styled, which is already kind of driving me crazy with desire. I bought her a bunch of super-sweet, super-tasty lingerie, mostly from Backseam on Etsy and then some from Flash You and Me, so she has a few sets to choose from. And we’re going out to Tallulah’s Garden, a pretty well-known high-end place in Philly. We’ll Lyft there and back so no stressing about drinking or parking.
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