Something turned, or maybe I should call it a twist. Saturday night was our best night ever. She continues to love trying new things. And she is loving the spanking and whipping. But I don’t want to focus only on that, although I can’t get it out of my head. There were so many new and different things and as usual I don’t recall them all at the moment. I’ll have to start writing to see if they come back to me.
It’s not that I forget what happened. When we’re in the moment, or a moment has just wrapped up and we’re physically recovering, catching our breath, and mentally resetting (sometimes we go to dark and unfamiliar places, and we need to recenter on our real selves before we continue onto another different path), it’s very clear that something just happened that I need to write about, and why. Typically it’s because we just did something new and different. And then a couple days later, or even the very next day, although I haven’t forgotten what we did each night, we will have done so many other amazing things that I can’t come up with what I thought, in that moment, was so essential to write about. Sometimes, the writing brings it back to me.
Anyway, we got high and fooled around Thursday and Saturday nights. Thursday was awesome, just fantastic. There were a lot of “news” (this is when I do something different that causes her to have a distinctly new kind of orgasm) and a few biggests; it was a very very good night. But the part I remember thinking I really needed to write about was the biting. You’ll have read before that I sometimes bite her–usually her neck and shoulders, but sometimes other places. I recently bit her foot, briefly, and that turned her on. It was brief because what do you do to continue it? With neck and shoulders you can go up and down, around the front or the back, and there’s always something to sink your teeth into–muscles, bones, tendons or whatever those ropey things in your neck are, gently on veins, even. On a foot I didn’t really know how to keep going. Bite her shin? That wouldn’t do anything.
Thursday it was neck and shoulders and I ravished her. It’s not just mouth; I use my body weight to hold her down, and my hands and arms and legs to confine her, and it makes her shiver in submission. I’ve mentioned the vampirism before, and the wild beast-ness of it all. So yeah, this time it felt like I was consuming her soul, making her my slave for all eternity. And then it felt like I was the lion killing the gazelle for its own survival. I asked her via text what it feels like to her, and she just said “neck/shoulder orgasms” (maybe it was too complicated a topic for a text). But then I asked “do you feel ravished?” and she wrote “yes.” These are the dark places I’m talking about. Actually it happens a lot with the biting. While the truth is I never do anything she doesn’t want me to do, or at least I don’t do it for long before she stops me, at these moments it feels like I can do whatever I want and she can’t stop me. Obviously she’s really vulnerable in this situation; I could genuinely hurt her, and the truth is, that elicits a feeling of such incredible power, power over her, that it never fails to a) seriously turn me on, and b) scare me a little. I wrote before about getting scared (I can’t remember which post); on that occasion I had to stop what I was doing, but now I can lean in to it lot of the time. Other times, if I stop to think, I can lose the moment; if I then notice how badly I’m objectifying her or otherwise stop to think about what’s going on, the moment gets interrupted or even thwarted. Sometimes I can start over, but sometimes I just have to go do something else for a while.
Another surprising development on Thursday night: I had something I can only call a body orgasm. I can’t remember exactly what we were doing at the time; I feel like I was lying on my back, probably recovering from an exhausting fucking episode, and maybe she was playing with my dick and scratching or rubbing my arms and chest. All those things happened, I just don’t know if they’re what stimulated my response. A wave of euphoria came over me–briefly, a few seconds at most, I felt this utter calm and pleasure. I don’t know why I thought this, but in the moment I was convinced that is was something I had never allowed myself to do, and that I was now allowing it somehow, and that I can now have them whenever I want. We’ll see. Maybe I can get it back sometime.
Finally: Thursday night I came in her ass again. It was so good. I wasn’t going so deep this time, maybe sliding 2-4″ in at any time. This was after a lot of truly hot doggie-style again, where I was just thoroughly attacking her and she was fighting back. Yow. The anal was like 5 minutes at the very end of a 3+ hour night. I said “I’m going to come in your ass, so let me know before you get worn out.” She replied “do it now.” I got going, and of course as soon as I picked up the pace and the intensity she started coming, so I made sure not to finish before that was happening. But within two minutes I was pulsing and throbbing and pumping out cum and oh my G-D it feels good to let it go in her perfect tight little ass.
On Saturday she again said “my pussy is feeling neglected–could you lay off on the back door for a while?” So I just said yes, even though her pussy got easily 40% of that night’s action and most of the rest was clit, neck, shoulders, etc. Very little ass! Like literally just that five minutes. No need to dispute that, though. And then that night, when we were going at it again, there she was, wiggling her little ass at me, pointing it up in the air, and spreading her legs to show me where to go. So I gently fingered her ass with my right hand while pinching and squeezing her clit with my left, and I said “I know your games–you tell me not to go back there and then you beg me for it when you know I can’t control myself. You are a very bad girl.” Which I don’t know if that’s the point, but lately with all the spanking she wants me to tell her how bad she’s been and what she did, so I was able to use that later and she LOVED it. And just mentioning it sent her into paroxysms of orgasm in that moment. Well, that and the three fingers I had up her asshole and the thumb and finger I had mangling her clit. They had something to do with it, too.
Saturday was our best night ever. Again, yes, our best ever. I’m not prepared to say exactly everything that was different about it this time, but the spanking and whipping got into that dark, unfamiliar place. And everything else did, too. But I know why, even if I’m not going to tell you everything about it.
You see, we had had a crazy night. We were supposed to go to a wedding in Center City at 5pm, but one of the kids was at a track meet that we thought ended at 1:30pm, no problem, but actually didn’t end until a lot later. The bus would take him back to school, but that’s a few miles from home. So we really needed to know if he had a ride home, but his phone was in his backpack, wherever that was, and he was rooting for teammates and warming up wherever he was, so he wasn’t hearing our calls and texts. It was 5:15pm by the time we knew he was going to be OK and we left for the wedding.
So we arrived at about 5:50pm and thought we’d have missed most of the cocktail hour. Neither the bride nor groom was around, so we thought nothing was amiss. But it kept going .. at about 6:20pm she said, quietly to me, “uh, is the ceremony happening soon?”. As it turned out, they did the ceremony first, and we’d already missed it. We learned this when meeting the bride’s father and he mentioned something she’d said to him during the ceremony. We played it cool. Anyway, then it was time for dinner and … I guess they never got our RSVP, because we weren’t on the list. There was no table for us.
Well, there we were all dressed up–like, really nicely–I was in a new suit with a tie, even, and she was in a beautiful, classy dress showing a lot of shoulder and showing off her tits and ass really nicely. She sat me down and she said “Look. We’ve had a drink. We look hot. Let’s go to the hotel restaurant” (which is well-known and was very good–Loews Hotel) “and have our own party.” So we did! I later got a text from the groom saying they could make room, but I said “dude, we’re having a great night. You have one too–stop worrying about us and just go have fun.”
I need to digress here. We all already know that having a big night like this, where you’re all dressed up and foxy and handsome, and having a great meal, is going to make your wife really fucking horny if you do it right. And I was doing it right. Complimenting her frequently, touching her arms gently and avoiding the groping that I usually can’t help, giving her little pecks on the lips every time it made sense, staring into her beautiful eyes. I was killing it and she was falling in love with me hard. And of course that was getting me all hot, too, because I could see her melting for me. The waitress and the other front-of-house staff knew why we were down there and all dressed up, and they treated us really well. The waitress spotted our dessert choice, and gave us each a comped glass of sparkling something or other, and we felt like a million bucks. So we took some tincture when we got back to the car and drove home fully prepared to knock each others’ socks off.
I need to digress a little further here. We’ve been in financial difficulty for a while. We’ll be OK, we have resources, but for a couple months we’ve been trying to save money on dinners out, which is our most significant extravagance. But the wedding being a total bust made us feel like OK, what else are we gonna do, and it was so freeing. So even before we got high we were already kind of high on being irresponsible and just not caring about this weight that otherwise has been a bit of a drag.
She was still happily drunk when we got home (I drank less–driving), and we did the tincture under our tongues to make it go faster, which I think probably worked. So it wasn’t long before she was in bed, teasing me and grabbing me and getting me to get started. Man, she was hot. She started saying something about how I deserved a lot of cocksucking, and I said “for being such a good man tonight?” and she said “no, for these,” and squeezed my triceps and deltoids. I said “alright, baby,” and she said “let’s start now.” She took my cock, not even hard yet, and sucked it until I was thoroughly hard and eventually, pre-coming. She doesn’t like the taste of pre-cum, so we called it at that point, which made sense anyway because I needed that hard-on for a few more hours.
I’m not going to give a play by play of Saturday night, but I will say that she was like that the whole night. In contrast to most nights, she just kept grabbing my cock and stuffing it into her mouth all night. Usually it’s once or twice a night, for a few minutes each. This was easily five different times, like the porn videos where the girl gives the boy head for a little bit at every transition point. And the night ended with a huge bang–she was enjoying it so much, doing an incredible job, coming every time she throated me, that I let her get me off with her mouth at the end of the night. It was a great blowjob throughout, 5 minutes or so, and we ended with a pretty hardcore face-fucking. I kept thrusting until I really couldn’t hold back, pulled out, and exploded. Nice.
This brings me to the book I referenced in the post title. On this blog I’ve quoted Esther Perel before; she’s a therapist who works in relationships and has slightly idiosyncratic and correct ideas about sex. This book I just read, Mating in Captivity (affiliate link) is well worth a read. I’m not going to do a full review here and unfortunately a quick online search doesn’t turn one up. The basic idea is that intimacy, in the sense of how close we become to our long-term partners, is antithetical to passion. So it’s a variety of “keep the mystery” but there’s a lot more to it than that.
For example, she tells people to plan for and work at sex. A lot of us think that good sex should be easy and spontaneous, like it felt when we first met. But we forget that actually a lot of work went into sex then, too … we planned dates, we dressed up and put on makeup, got haircuts and blowouts, had amazing dinners, etc. These are all foreplay, in some sense, and we should keep that up now. She also says we need to objectify our partners–selfish sex is good sex. And that egalitarianism doesn’t really work in the bedroom–tension, power imbalances, fear and anxiety (e.g. of being left, or rejected in some way) can all contribute to hotter sex. So I basically agree with everything she says. She doesn’t say anything about marijuana, but the book is from 2006 or thereabouts, when it would have been a lot less available and not by prescription, of course. In any case it’s unlikely she would have said anything about it in a book and risk censure. She’s a practicing therapist.
Now, back to Saturday. She hasn’t really gotten used to how gorgeous and hot and smart and capable she is, probably because she was shy and didn’t get a lot of interest in high school, even though women around here give her dirty looks whenever we’re out to dinner. We both have issues with our hands so don’t wear our rings a lot, so they see us together and think she’s a 30-something slut going out with a guy who just ditched his older wife. They have no idea she’s a 50-something slut. Anyway, one of her quirks is that she will fish for compliments by saying “Are we together?” and “Why are you going out with me?” and that kind of thing. And she really is fishing for compliments, but she also kind of really feels that way sometimes. So then I take the opportunity to say nice things about her, or nuzzle up to her ear and say not so nice things, and she gets tingly and feels good.
Well, she was doing this a lot during the whole busted wedding fiasco and dinner, and it was getting very cute and not annoying at all, because we were so hot for each other and it was a fun way to play. But later, I was whipping her ass really good. She had a machine going on her clit and I was really whacking her. Her ass was turning red, in stripes at first but then just all over, and I can’t say we’ve ever enjoyed that before but we both did, this time. Now, she always asks me what she did that was so bad, because it turns her on when I tell her what terrible things she did. (I actually run out of bad behaviors–I have to be creative about this and plan ahead.)
This time it occurred to me, somehow, I don’t know why or how, that she really needed to be humiliated. There’s often a little bit of that, e.g. when she made the double entendre about getting the bed all wet we exploited that taboo, and that on its face, was belittling to her, even if it neither of us really takes it that way. Anyway earlier in the evening she had wanted to hear some stories, and it seemed like she was up for something really dirty. I started with just that one hot 25 year-old guy, first me sucking his cock then fucking his tight boy pussy while he ate her pussy. Later we spitroasted her, and then all his friends came, like ten of them, and so a lot of really hot men gangbanged her and she was really into it (for the most part–I said some things that didn’t quite work, but didn’t ruin the moment, either). Then, basically every woman at our township pool lined up to suck my cock, and she encouraged them, and she loved that. So when it came to what she had done that she was being punished for, obviously there was all that, and it was a little humiliating, I’m sure, to be told what a slut she was and all that. But there was another part where I’m not ready to say what I said, because I don’t know if she heard me, clearly, and it would take some good writing to tell it to you in a way you understood where she was coming from. So if it comes up again and seems like a trend, maybe I’ll give it a try.
I’ll close by saying Sunday, yesterday, the day after, she was horny all day and I got her off a few times each on a few different occasions throughout the day, then got her off probably 25 more times when we went to bed. She claims she still felt high, but of course that’s impossible, and anyway she was way too active–taking off her own clothes and otherwise being very mobile–to have been high. So I think she was just high on how great the sex was, and how badly she wants me. But that was really good–if we don’t have sober sex now and again we actually start to wonder if we still can.
Leave a Reply